Tom Petty had it right when he said (or sang), "Oh, the way-ay-ting is the hardest part".
It occurred to me this morning that if this were a real pregnancy, I'd be in my third trimester. To be specific, I'd be almost 38 weeks pregnant at this point. And miserable. (Oh, wait....). I'd be sitting around with my feet up, visiting the doctor weekly and, reluctantly (ha!), allowing others to wait on me hand and foot.
Instead, I often feel that we've been dropped into the black hole of waiting (which, by the way, is no one's fault; just the way it is). I can't feel a baby moving and we don't have the promise that we definitely will NOT go past the 40 week mark. Instead, what I know is that we've been waiting 38 weeks....and we may very well wait 38 more.
If you're the praying type, not even one would be wasted on us (for peace, for patience, for discernment). We have received some information from our agency regarding our potential wait that is a bit discouraging. Technically, there is only one family ahead of us on the wait list whose parameters (age and sex) are similar to ours. That's the good news. The bad news is that this family has been waiting for 18 months.
We have the ability to amend our Home Study and extend our parameters; broadening the possibilities, if you will. We know that He has a plan....and it's perfect, as always. We just don't want to run ahead of him.....or lag behind because we're not listening.
I'm not going to lie and say that we aren't discouraged. We are. But this too shall pass and I know that there will come a time that we will look back on these days and know what a vapor they really were.
In other news, we're rounding out another month and new wait list numbers will be communicated soon. At this point, I am not anticipating any movement on the list. Last month was a big month for all of us; we're probably due a little lull. : )